' running a never ending road______

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

yo. well, didnt go to school today and i am here about to die of boredness. hahas. yup. any way, we are drifting apart real fast. i didnt know what made that happen but it is. from talking every day for hours to talk only some times not even through the phone but through msn. well. i guess its because i dont have my hp with me still. and when i do, we are at the same place so theres no need to even talk to each other using the phone. we dont even talk when we are so close to each other. you was right beside me a few times but, we didnt even talk. i used to talk to you so often that i find us two so close not in terms of relationship but in friendship.i know that my mum have objections of me talking to you, but why care? its my life. i see you online. but i dont even dare talk to you unless you talk to me first. sigh. its going to be a year since we ever start talking to each other so often. the few years age gap between us didnt matter and yet our friendship can just start fading away. you made me happy, you took care of me, you help me in times of troubles, you taught me stuff and more.you respected me and gave me trust and i respected you and gave you trust too. i kept your secrets and bear your sorrows. you gave me love and i gave you love. i dont look down on you like others do. every one has their weak points. for you, its studies. but you are so strong in music and in arts. i tried to make you smile. i did favours for you till the extent of getting into trouble myself. i gave you what you wanted. we have the same thinking at times and its just so ironic that we put down the same song for that game and we are in the same group and we share the same interest. you are one person who have shown me perseverance and i am trying to learn that from you. you are one who is serious at stuff at theres play at times. you are such a fun and joval person to be with and you are a nice person but have more hope in God. he does miricles and be more optimistic and get your mood swing off you. there is such a slim hope that you would come to read this. but i will just have to put it down here.

another person. in your blog, you wrote that someone has changed. i guess its me. well, you have changed too. you didnt use to just leave us like that and we enjoyed the times we had together. i went out of the music shop cause i wanted to talk to anthia. your could continue being inside and we will just wait for your. i have nothing in mind to buy and i had gone to a music shop recently and dig out for all the CDS i wanted. i felt sick there. so i just followed anthia. i just didnt know what happened to you. you have changed. i didnt. i am still as optimistic and as cheerful like what you said. ok. i admit deafeat. the cup thingy is normally 250ml. its my fault k. i was jeust being helpful telling you not to drink so much green tea cause it is alot of sugar. but you just wont listen. i am not trying to insult you or what-so-ever. but come on. its sugar content inside. you know what happens when there is too much sugar content inside? i didnt want to pick up any argument. but you have changed. you really did more then the person above. ther person above i cant blame him because its my fault since i dont have my phone with me or we still will be as close i guess. but you. i see you every school day. i joke with you around so much. i provide you things you need. i didnt know where you have learnt to even go insult people. is that what you are suppose to do?you go to church and they teach you that? no matter who support you in doing so, you are NOT suppose to do that. where are your qualities that has been instilled in you? you used to be so happy, so cheerful, so optimistic. if you dont do well in your maths and science paper, work harder for it. you will succeed one day. trust me. you should work hard. and not give up. i didnt do well for my first maths paper. and i told myself i have to do well. and i presevered through the last paper. why give up so easily? have faith in yourself. you dont even do your homework. how are you even going to pass and get flying colours? you are a clever person. so just study and you will get your marks. i study like siiao, my marks are still not comparable to yours. i still regard you as my good friend and i hope you will do so.

another person. well. i just know this person after may. its just a few months. i dont know what changed has taken in you. but you have changed greatly. why do you even dao me? we were so close that we also talk alot every single day of the holiday. you introduce movies to me while i introuduce songs to you. perhaps i dont know you well enough. i trusted you like i trusted the first person. we have the same points. we are from art club and we are all worshippers of the LORD. when ever i try to make contact between us, your reply is just a few words. i wonder what have changed. i apologised to you thinking that i was the one at fault. but i suddenly realised it was you who changed. i did not changed much. i am still the same ever since i known you. sigh. i just have to pray hard for you.

like the song, wake me up when september ends by green day, " the innocent can never last" every one does changes. but i hope people around me and inculding myself would change for the better. take care peeps and God bless. oh ya. remember to reflect on yourself before reflecting on others. to those people above, if you know who you are, i pray that you will not take it as an insult but a compliment. sorry if my words does hurt you. but its a fact.

*still thinking of you..... dare not drop you a call. if you do read this, please call me right. loving you and thinking of you still.( those who dont know what i am saying, please dont get the wrong idea.)

5:44 AM

died__